Bitter Thoughts

No one seems to understand me. Actually, sometimes I think I don't even understand myself. I keep a lot of things under lock and key. I don't like going around sharing secrets because well.. I think secrets are meant to be kept secret. Maybe I'm afraid of opening up. Maybe I'm afraid that it will tear me apart like it once did. Maybe I just don't feel like it. Sometimes, even to myself I am mysterious. I have been having a lot of thoughts lately. Second guessing myself. Second guessing everything. I keep playing scenarios in my head. I keep thinking about different situations. I can't help but wonder if there's something you're not telling me. I can't help but linger on those words you said to me. That you want someone more similar to yourself.. not even the past tense, but the present. So it makes me wonder if you even still want me. If you're staying because you want to and because you believe in us or because you're stuck.